When I woke up this morning I thought certain things would take place as usually do on a typical Monday. I woke up a little later than usual which happens too often, so it should be called the usual. I took the trash out as is now my Monday and Thursday morning tradition, as to keep the peace in my house. I pulled up to the Railroad tracks going out of my neighborhood behind a minivan that belongs to my somewhat neighbor and dear co-worker. I started to gesture to her, I poke at her at work because she hardly ever sees anyone on the road, but this morning I held back for some unknown reason, maybe it was too early…
I stopped to get gas before I came in to the office; $15 just doesn’t cut it in a late model Chevy truck with a way too big engine. I started my typical morning routine; quote of the day, email and check the news. Nothing out of the ordinary but then I pulled out my phone and checked Facebook. I haven’t paid much attention to it all weekend so there was a lot of “junk” to sift through. But as I was perusing my news feed I noticed a comment on someone’s wall, someone offering prayers for their loss.
The wall belonged to my co-worker, the one I had seen this morning. I hadn’t heard anything, maybe a friend or a distant relative. So I clicked on her wall and read through the comments. Here wall was covered with prayers and condolences but nothing telling of what had transpired. Then someone mentioned a name and my heart dropped. The name was her Husband’s but I had thought that maybe someone else near to her family bore the same name. So I went to her boss’s office and checked in. She told me the tragic news. I sank into shock. To be honest I’m not real close to her or her family but from time to time we talk and converse on personal matters, enough to know about her daughters and for me to tell her about my growing family. I knew her husband well enough to speak if I saw him and I know he and their two daughters were extremely close. Immediately my thoughts went to them.
How do we deal with such a loss? As a Husband I can’t imagine losing my wonderful wife. I can’t think about what would happen to her and my kids if something happened to me. I haven’t dealt directly with a loss this severe. Death is inevitable but you come to expect time. We forget how fragile time is. Through petty arguments and not appreciating the moments you share with your loved ones we turn our heads on the fact that time is limited. How many times have you hung up on someone, went to sleep angry or even drove off after an argument? That might be the last you ever see that person, hear their voice or feel their touch. How many times have you said not now or just a minute. That precious moment might be the last.
I don’t want to be a downer, just the opposite. I just to want show a little perspective. The loss of life is tragic and devastating especially when it is sudden. I have experienced this from a distance but never first hand. What is the best way to console a person, what can you say or do when their world has shattered?
This morning I saw her and something kept me from making some wild gesture. Was that divine interference? I think it was. God works in mysterious ways and this morning he helped me keep foot out of mouth. Now through her family and friends he helps console her and her two daughters. So if you are reading this please send out your prayers and thoughts for the Donaho family. They need all of the love and support in this tough time of loss.
